Chapter Seven - A new perculiar kind of strange.
Having observed these new, strange and some what fascinating creatures for a significant period of time now, I finally feel as though progress is being made. A snipet of time with one of America’s natives, ‘ Maureen’ has ensured that I gather enough evidence to make my final conclusion. The day has been slow, long, hours dragging my british feet around Nacho - loving soil tires me to the point, where all I want to do is sleep upon some semen filled bed in what they call ’ a motel’. Having been watching several shows prior to my journey, I had gathered that these places were simply figments of the imagination. Just like Narnia, Neverland and Russia. I was mistaken. So having laid my head down on beds used for acts that could only be show on the television after Emmerdale, and Holyoaks has finished, I slept.
The next morn. Test subject 1. Maureen. Focus: Language.
This was extremely useful in understanding the American mind; although English, they seem to have taken it by the throat, and twisted it until it vomited a whole new substance. Not that , the substance which was vomited was vile as most things escaping the mouth of a girl may be. It was somewhat, beautiful. A twang added to that accent, a bigger twang than you get once you eat one of those fizzy vimto lollipops. It was highly educational. I not only learnt that jam is refferred to as jelly, but then jelly is named jelo. As it rolled off my tongue, although the accent differing vastly; I could not help myself from thinking that it was the offspring of JLO, and nobody wants Jenny from the block. Which lead me into my train of thought, thinking.. ’ Did she even sing that?’. Who knows. But what I did know that I had gained yet another fact. Fact 165 to be precise.
Fact 165 : Americans love variation,and miss R’s in words.
